Have you ever had a feeling of inadequacy and intimidation? Have you ever felt that no matter how well you try, you just won’t and can’t measure up? Have you ever wished to have someone else’s life?
Well, I have and I am sure you have too. This however doesn’t make us discontent people. There are people who are better, more beautiful, intelligent and wealthier than us. We might even find those that have it all. Having and feeling inferior and insecure are not unusual feelings, But it becomes a problem when these feelings become self-consuming or chronic to the point where you start losing your self-worth and importance.
In today’s article, we will be discussing the term inferiority complex, its signs and symptoms, its causes and ways to overcome it.
What is Inferiority Complex?
The American Psychological Association defines an inferiority complex as a constant feeling of inadequacy or insecurity in a person’s daily life due to a belief that you are physically or mentally inferior to others, whether those beliefs are based on rational assessments or not.
In simple terms, it is a feeling of inadequacy based on imaginary ideas that you have about yourself and others.
Inferiority Complex was invented by Alfred Adler and was first used in 1907. Adler’s theory states that an inferiority complex is the natural-born psychological state of all people. It begins in infancy and continues throughout everyone’s lifetime He believed that people want to prove that they are superior to others. This is a result of their inherent feelings of inferiority which consequently brings about other conditions such as low self-esteem and depression.
A person with this condition may have a flashy outward appearance, be an attention seeker, might be excessively competitive, seek perfectionism, downplay their achievements and good qualities and always want to prove themselves better than others to boost their self-esteem. And when they fail at something, they tend to belittle the achievements of others. This is why it is important for to love and carry yourself in high esteem because if you don’t, then who Will? Some other symptoms and signs of Chronic Low self-esteem are as follows;
- low self-esteem issues
- insomnia
- Uncontrolled eating habit
- fear of being judged
- Seeing your flaws and imperfections frequently
- Unacceptance of criticism
- Comparing yourself with others
- Perfectionism
- Difficulty accepting compliments
- Always lonely and withdraws from social gatherings.
Causes of Chronic Low Self-esteem.
The causes of Inferiority Complex are numerous but according to Dr. Tzall, a combination of social, individual and environmental factors might lead to the development of Inferiority Complex. But a major cause of this complex is parental upbringing and society.
Other causes include;
- Parental Attitude and Upbringing: A parent’s role in shaping the life of a child cannot be underestimated. This is because the family is the first unit the child is exposed to. Therefore, the attitudes, values, and habits (good and bad) are what the child immediately grasps as his or her own until he/she is grown enough mentally to know wrong from right. When a parent compares their children with others they tend to cause more harm than good. Frequent comparison of one’s child causes him/ her to start creating feelings of inadequacy, insecurity and incompleteness. He/she starts to base his successes and achievements on what others have and how far his mates have gone, not what he/she has and the pace of his/her progress. This makes the child totally lose focus. When this happens the child is bound to live life not truly knowing who he/ she is and thereby losing his potential. R
- Social Media: Social media is also a major factor in chronic low self-esteem. Due to this, a lot of people have lost their lives. Social media can cause people to feel inadequate about their lives and appearance. This is not supposed to be, it’s therefore imperative that we love our selfs just the way we are and strive to become the best version of us that we can be.
- Traumatic Experiences: Traumatic Experiences can also be a very germane factor that leads to the development of Inferiority Complex. People who suffer from such trauma might never get over them but also can if they seek medical help.
- Physical Characteristics: There will definitely be some days when you would feel you need some extra height, need to get a particular figure, a flat tummy, and so on. This will happen to everyone, and it’s quite normal to feel this way. This is where self-love comes into play. You have to learn to be grateful for what you have. And develop those flaws to make up for what you do not have.
- Financial Factors: Economic and financial strive could also be a factor of low self-confidence. Especially when you wish you had enough money to get that lovely accessory you have been dreaming about and have to leave it to get something of necessity. It’s impertinent to cut one’s coat according to one’s clothes.
Five Ways to Overcome Inferiority Complex.
Now that we understand the fact that there is nobody who cannot feel inferior, let us see five ways of overcoming them.
- Build Self-Confidence: One of the easiest ways of overcoming chronic low self-esteem is by building your confidence, easier said than done though but you have to try. You must not only try to be confident but be confident. It must reflect in the way you speak, the way you let others talk to You and the way you carry yourself. Mind you, don’t put on an act or try to prove that you are confident, be confident because it looks good on you, be confident because yes, you may not be perfect but you love and respect yourself enough to be confident and yes be confident because there is no one else as gorgeous and talented you. When you are confident and not seeking attention, you tend to get other people’s admiration. Dare to be you. Another important way to build confidence is to confront your fears. What are you scared of? Speaking out in public? Whatever it may be, take a bold step and engage in it.
- Never Compare Yourself: When you compare yourself with someone else, you limit yourself and your potential to that particular person. If there is anything more draining in this life, it is striving so much to be like someone else when you should be doing your own thing and achieving your dreams. Oliver James once said, “Why try to fit in when you were born to stand out.” What’s most important in all these is that you try every single day to develop and build on your strengths and weaknesses and just shine that light that is in you.
- Stop seeking other people Validations: Now, this is one of the greatest problems that not only people suffering from low esteem suffer but people generally. It’s important to seek people’s validation but don’t let it be so rampant. Waiting for people to tell you look great all the time is irrelevant. The only person’s permission on consent that’s needed is yours. Seeking people’s convent is good but do not make it a basis for your existence. Do what you want to do and let others deal with it.
- Know Thy Self: Aristotle once said, “To know Thy self is the beginning of wisdom.” Ask yourself, What kind of person am I?, What’s my best mode of learning? What are my strengths? What are my weaknesses? And how can they be improved and developed? Answering these questions enables you to put a lot of weight and pressure on your shoulders. It is impossible to attain perfection, just do you. Surround yourself with people who truly care about you and are also working at achieving their own dreams while following their pace, not other people’s own.
- Learn to be grateful: learn to be grateful for even the simplest things, research has shown gratitude allows for greater happiness. Even if you are not where you wish you would be or achieved that dream, it’s still important for you to be grateful for what you have. There are a lot of people who are just wishing and hoping to get what you have, but they are still grateful.
Final words
Having feelings of inferiority, inadequacy and insecurity is normal But like was earlier said, most of these inadequacies and insufficiencies are all your head, They do not exist. We just somehow create them for ourselves.
Whatever it is you feel inferior about, work to develop it, love yourself, your flaws and weaknesses and don’t live your life in someone else’s shadow. You are worth more than that.
For a person who has had to suffer from this condition from adolescence, it may be really difficult to stop but with the right medical care and therapy, they can be a remarkable change.
Lastly, Eleanor Roosevelt said, No one can make you feel inferior without your consent.
